Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
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