no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize