I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
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