ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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