Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Randomize
