ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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