i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
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