Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
