i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Randomize