sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize