Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Randomize
