spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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