Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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