sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
