I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
A bitchslap is in order.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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