everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
