So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
