i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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