Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
I think I just sharted jello shots
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
