I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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