Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
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