yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
