I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
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