So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
