you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
