i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
