He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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