you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Randomize
