Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
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