and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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