I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
FUCK WHALES
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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