She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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