Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
