It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
