Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores http://tfl.nu/a1sm
  Replies (12) Good night (3795) Bad night (582)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike. http://tfl.nu/hlna
  Replies (49) Good night (877) Bad night (5543)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking. http://tfl.nu/zwfn
  Replies (25) Good night (7758) Bad night (1459)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (740): his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass http://tfl.nu/zmgu
  Replies (13) Good night (712) Bad night (6274)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse. http://tfl.nu/dgcu
  Replies (12) Good night (788) Bad night (3385)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer http://tfl.nu/h8i3
  Replies (6) Good night (4388) Bad night (1131)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious http://tfl.nu/ofzu
  Replies (31) Good night (6269) Bad night (1037)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (509): Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that. http://tfl.nu/jsxj
  Replies (10) Good night (5794) Bad night (1751)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (302): just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach. http://tfl.nu/5cxr
  Replies (3) Good night (2855) Bad night (834)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (216): There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us. http://tfl.nu/2y42
  Replies (4) Good night (1769) Bad night (767)
• Favorite

  (325): View more from Texas

  We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (325): We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget." http://tfl.nu/mx4s
  Replies (4) Good night (2036) Bad night (670)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death. http://tfl.nu/x5xg
  Replies (4) Good night (1116) Bad night (462)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal? http://tfl.nu/khtc
  Replies (7) Good night (898) Bad night (442)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game http://tfl.nu/wvii
  Replies (1) Good night (661) Bad night (697)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment? http://tfl.nu/2ow0
  Replies (2) Good night (696) Bad night (365)

Randomize