How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
You came to the right person.