I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
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