Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
