I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Randomize
