So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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