i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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