i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Randomize
