Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
That accounts for only three of the penises
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Randomize