I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
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