I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Randomize
