nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
