That's intense
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Come share oat with me in your robe
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Randomize
