Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
