So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Randomize
