if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
