idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
